Say CHEESE! You’re off to prison.

Ahhh Lindsay. I went to high school with a couple of girls like her. I don’t mean that they were absolute rubbish at designing clothes, or that they were photographed constantly on their back or pulling their knickers off, or that their parents were famous for being reformed drug addicts, ex cons and media whores, or that their penchant for semi-nudity and collagen belied their loudly-announced “I’m a regular girl. I’m fine.”

I just mean that they were brainless skanks who irritated the living crap out of me.

On Tuesday 24 year old Lindsay Lohan was officially incarcerated. Many are hoping this is the final shattering pile up in her train wreck of a life. I’m one of them. In the last couple of years I’ve started to feel less irritation and more pity. I even wrote her a letter, but as you can probably guess, I never sent it. However I think I was on to something at the time…

Without discussing the issues her parents appear to have, who wouldn’t be a mess with that much excess baggage.

But look what I really came here to discuss was her mug shot.  Because it seems Lindsay might have been a bit conscious of her appearance. She would know all too well that celebrity mug shots get widely plastered across every news headline and internet gossip site for the days that follow. My blog now included. (Not that CC is a gossip blog, but a commentary on pop culture which includes celebrity behaviour)

 To make comparisons, here is Lindsay Lohan’s very first mugshot.

 

Here is Lindsay 2 weeks ago in court.

 

Here she is in court on Tuesday, right before they cuffed her and drove her to prison.

 

Here is the shot taken moments before entering her cell at Lynwood Regional Detention Centre.

 Okay, some observations.  

HAIR
I think Linsday spent more money and time preparing for this photo than I did for my wedding photos. She’s definitely had her roots done and possibly had an all over re-colour to freshen up the brassy blonde look.

PLASTIC FACE
No doubt her lips have been filled with something.    Dermatologist Dr. Kenneth Beer, owner of ScientificSkin.com, reported to Us Weekly Magazine, “She has had injections of a filler such as Restylane or Juvederm. To me, it looks like about 1 to 2 syringes of product were used on her upper and lower lips… it will last for about 6 to 8 months.” He also suspects she “…had some Botox [injected into] her forehead and frown lines.”

MAKEUP
Forgive me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it kind of a waste of makeup if you’re off to prison for a couple of weeks. Who is she hoping to look pretty for?  Actually, half the world so I guess it makes sense. But in her original mug-shot she appears makeup-less.

When she arrived on Tuesday, the jail apparently went into lockdown mode for an hour with other prisoners confined to their cells. She was strip searched and cavity searched right before changing into her new orange jumpsuit, after which the above photo was taken.

How Lindsay managed to look so calm after that is beyond me. I believe Miss Lohan was determined to improve on her last mug-shot, even if every ounce of her DNA was feeling violated. Perhaps she’s just happy that her 90 day sentence was reduced to a mere 14, with an additional 90 days in rehab.

I think she was going for the Paris Hilton mug-shot look? Seems that way, given the lowered chin, the smirky smile and the eyes that look like they’re saying, “Yeah… and?”

 

Next stop was here: Her room for the next 14 days for 23 hours a day.   

 

SIDENOTE: Today her mum and sister visited her and delivered a copy of Ernest Hemingway’s “Old Man and the Sea.” Der….. Really? Oh well, whatever helps. I’d be asking for some feel-good chick lit if I was in there… something to make me laugh and forget. Not Lindsay.

Incase you’ve never read it, it’s about an old fisherman whose at the end of his life, and feels regret that he hasn’t caught a fish for months. He sets out alone to change his luck and encounters a huge fish, which he struggles with for 3 days enduring much pain and delirium, but finally catches. Then he gets harassed by sharks – all of which he kills, but not before they devour his catch.

It’s a story of hardship and struggles, but with a promising ending. The old man overcame his bad luck, fought his demons and conquered. Let’s hope Lindsay can do the same.

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One comment

  1. cheneetot08 · July 22, 2010

    Great post.. Hope after her 90 days in prison she will become more mature and do things right.

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